I don't even know what to title this one...

Nick just found something on the floor and said, "Is this a worm?"
Maggie scoffed and said, "No, worms are slimy. That's dried out."
Nick said, "Well, I thought it was a dead, dried out worm."
To which Maggie responded (with no small measure of disgust at having to explain such an obvious concept to her father), "If you want to know if it's a worm, just put it in your mouth and see if it tastes like a worm."

Then she gave it a taste and declared, "No, not a worm!"
(While Nina yelled, "No Maggie! You could choke on it!!")

There's so much wrong with this exchange that I don't even know where to start... So I put it up here on the blog.